The Bargaining Path Read online

  ***

  “You guys do realize I’m doing the training for that? Well, I’m one of five trainers?” James asked as he pushed Penny on the swing set outside of the school house. She squealed in delight as she went higher and higher, laughing hysterically all the while.

  “Yeah, and don’t you think it will be awesome to hang out with us all day?” I asked, grinning widely.

  “If you’re going to look like that, then no.” He said, “I’m definitely not going to go easy on you guys if you do this.”

  “Well, duh, James!” Alice said, “But it doesn’t matter. We want to do this.”

  “I am going to go harder on you two than I do on anyone, because if I don’t, everyone is going to say you two don’t deserve to be where you’re at, and I’m not a fair instructor.”

  “Are there really that many people signing up?”

  “Town Hall is overflowing with people, and the trainers have to clear everyone unanimously. So, we’re going to be busy. And everyone knows that I’m going to be a hard-ass. We’re all going to be hard-asses. What did my erstwhile girlfriend say about this? I can only imagine.”

  “She was upset. She says she loves us too much to see us do this, or something.” Alice said, “And Savannah said we’re crazy, and now you’re warning us that you’re going to be a hard-ass. No one thinks we can do it! And you know, you should be doing everything in your power right now to win back your ‘erstwhile girlfriend.’”

  “How is she doing?” He asked, “I can’t tell when I pick up Penny if she’s really okay or if she’s just saying she is.”

  “She misses you, man.” I told him, “You need to be trying to sort this out with her.”

  “No. I need to be giving her space. That’s what she wants. After I fucked up like that, the only thing I can do to start making it up to her is give her what she wants, and she wants some time apart.”

  “You’re not sleeping with anyone else, are you?”

  “Allie!” He and I exclaimed, and we both gestured at Penny, who was swinging herself now. James walked over to the fence and lit a cigarette.

  “Of course I’m not!” He told her, “I’ve seen Janna skulking around, and Kara and Michele have been trying to jump me every night, but of course I haven’t slept with any of them. Did she ask you to ask me that?”

  “God, what is it with you two, thinking that you’re both trying to use us as messengers?” Alice said with a roll of our eyes, “Everyone is so annoying today. You’re discouraging mine and Quinn’s amazing idea, and now you two are using us as pawns in your fight.”

  “I just asked you a question, darlin’. I did not ask you to tell her anything, and I doubt she asked you to tell me anything. Calm down. Anything I need to tell Brynna, I’ll tell her when I drop Miss Penelope back at home.”

  “You should just tell her you’re moving back in. Just be like, ‘Guess what? I’m coming home, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.’”

  “She’d make me sleep outside.”

  Alice and I laughed, and he looked at us quizzically.

  “Nothing.” We both said, before he could ask.

  “Okay. Look, if you guys want to enlist, just join the Army, okay? The training for that is more vigorous than it is for the Deep Cover Agents, but you two would be better suited to that. You’d still get to be here in the village when you were off duty, and you’ll still get to go out into the world and fight for us. Best of both worlds, right?” He asked.

  Alice and I looked at each other, neither of us having any objection to that. Sure, we wanted to be Deep Cover Agents because it was the coolest of the options, but the Army was just as rigorous, and James was right, we’d still be getting out and seeing Pangaea. We’d still be fighting. Alice sighed heavily, and he mimicked her.

  “Tell the light of my life and the fire of my loins that I miss her, okay? And tell her that I just quoted Lolita because I know she’ll get mad about it, and I miss her indignant fury. Actually, don’t tell her, because she’s still too mad at me to laugh. And in the meantime, go tell Don at Town Hall that you want to enlist in the Army. We start training in two days.”

  “I am going to tell Brynna everything you just said.” I told him.

  “You better not, or I’ll really kick your ass in training.”

  “Oh, bring it, old man!”

  “Quinn, he is going to whoop you so hardcore at training.” Allie warned me, “You just watch.”